NBC Admits to Passing Old Law & Order Reruns as New!

In what will truly go down as a day that will live in infamy, we learned today that NBC mega-hit Law & Order has in fact been airing repeats and passing them off as new. Complaints first started pouring in when one viewer tuned in to find Jerry Orbach solving crimes on the long-running show. Still more complaints flooded in when an episode touted as being "Ripped from the headlines" featured two defendants bearing a striking resemblance to the Menendez brothers. NBC C.E.O., Jeff Zucker held a press conference to address these issues.

"I guess it all started when he had our summer rerun campaign of 'If you haven't seen it, its new to you!' We started thinking, there's been so many episodes of Law & Order, no one could've possibly seen all them. Looks like we were wrong and it was those losers that have seen them all that sold us out. Thanks a lot, ya nerds."

Actress Angie Harmon, who hadn't filmed a "new" episode since 2001, had this to say when reached for comment, "Whoo-Hoo! I'm relevant again! I can't wait to get my residual check for this so I can finally buy that tuna fish sandwich I've had on layaway!" Unfortunately, not every cast member shares in Harmon's jubilance. Benjiman Bratt was quoted as, "I hate you, Julia Roberts! You ruined my life! I'm sorry...I still love you, take me back!"

People for the Ethical Treatment of the Elderly, or PETE as I like to call them, are also up in arms over NBC's deception. We got a chance to catch up with Tobey Murti, a spokesman for PETE;
"What the eff, NBC? You know no one under the age of 50 watches Law & Order. This is clearly taking advantage of the poor memory of the elderly. Do you know some viewers thought they were in heaven because they were seeing Jerry Orbach? It took hours of convincing for them to realize they were alive." It should also be noted that this is not the first time Mr. Murti has had a run in with the long-running NBC crime show. "We've been trying to get them to change that transition DUN-DUN sound for years. It frightens the elderly terribly."

Authorities are looking further into this situation, including investigating episodes of ER and CSI.