Delusions of Grandeur.

Rocking out. We’ve all done it. Some more than others. Got the place all to your self. Crank the music up. It'll start innocently enough. Your neck starts to groove to the tune. Then, the classically inevitable feet taps. Oh yeah, you’re getting into it. Maybe you lose control of your arms and hit the ol’ imaginary drums. Remember those foot taps? Now they’re turning into steps. Your arms go to your sides and form a rudimentary guitar. Don’t you dare hold back. You form that left hand into what may very well could be a chord(Sure, why not? That might be a chord) and strum your little heart out. Don’t forget the solo. Now, most people stop there. The lame people. Go for it.

Change the chords, move up and down the neck. Step up to the mic. Now is your time to shine. Those thousands of people paid $200 to Ticketmaster to hear you so you'd better start singing along. (Oooh, not too loud, the neighbors didn't pay anything.) There ya go, that soft falsetto whisper is enough to convince you that you should have a record deal, but not loud enough for anyone to be able to disagree with you. Now you're free to sing your little Styx lovin' heart out. Here comes the solo. Look over at the bass player, he gives you a nod as if to say, "Go for it, duder." He always says duder, it drives you nuts, but you guys have been good friends since childhood. Sure you had that rocky period when you both went to different high schools, but you remembered the rockin' good times and now you don't just rock together, you roll together.

What are we waiting for?! This solo isn't gonna play itself! Start that b-boy up. Make sure you bring your chord hand and strumming hand together real close. Turn this mother out. Make some awkward faces that could easily be confused for your O-face, but right now that's your "Oh, I almost can't handle all the ROCK-face." OWN IT. Walk over to the rhythm guitarist, you two do that thing. Um, y'know...when you two look at each others guitars like you're not sure what to play next. There ya go. Cocky bastard. The two of you are constantly butting heads. He's always like, "Why can't we put some of the songs that I write on the album." And your all like, "Cus they suuuuuuck!" The measly 60,000 copies his solo album sold backed you up on that one, but when he showed his true colors as a friend when you were in rehab. Friends like that are hard to find. You may not always see eye to eye, but neither did Lennon/McCartney. You two can be the next Lennon/McCartney! Far out.

Sounds like this solo is wrapping up so that means its time to rock out that last chorus. You have a choice here between clapping your hands over your head or holding the mic out to the audience for them to sing along. I like to go with the clapping. If anyone wanted to hear the audience sing, they'd be putting the asses in the seats, not you.

Great set. Walk off the stage and listen to the sweet sounds of all those people not just wanting you, but wanting to be you. What a great feeling.

Oh wait. That's not the crowd calling, that's my Mom. Man, do I need to get my own place.

What's your favorite song to rock out to?